Chapter 8
And that mattered.
Mom came around the table.
She put her arms around me.
“I am so sorry.”
I let her hold me.
But I didn't tell her everything was fine.
Because it wasn't.
Forgiveness didn't require pretending otherwise.
After a while, Tyler stood.
“Can I ask you something, Aunt Kate?”
“Of course.”
He looked toward the television.
“Why didn't you ever tell anyone who you were?”
I considered the question.
Then I answered as simply as I could.
“Because when that video came out, everybody wanted to talk about the pilot who kept the helicopter steady.”
I swallowed.
“But I kept thinking about the man we couldn't bring home.”
Tyler nodded.
“Pavel.”
I looked up sharply.
“You remember his name?”
“It's in the case study.”
For some reason, that meant more to me than everything else that had happened that afternoon.
Tyler continued.
“Our instructor says the most important decision in the recording wasn't staying for the last attempt.”
I waited.
“He says it was leaving.”
My throat tightened.
Tyler looked at me.
“Because you didn't let the need to save one person kill nineteen more.”
Four crew members.
Fourteen survivors.
And Dominic, who was already counted among the crew.
Eighteen people aboard when we departed.
Tyler caught his mistake before I corrected him.
“Eighteen,” he said quietly. “Sorry.”
I smiled faintly.
“Always count your crew.”
He nodded.
Then he said, “I used to think the hardest part of flying was being brave.”
I looked at him.
“What do you think now?”
He glanced at the screen.
“Knowing when bravery turns into something dangerous.”
I felt a sudden, fierce pride.
“That's a good lesson.”
He hesitated.
“Would you help me prepare for my night hover check?”
I laughed.
It came out half a sob.
“Tyler, I'd love to.”
He smiled.
Then, very seriously, he said, “And I won't call you ma'am at Thanksgiving.”
“Good. Because I'll make you wash dishes.”
For the first time since the video started, the room filled with genuine laughter.
Even Grandpa laughed.
Especially Grandpa.
Mitchell didn't come back until dessert.
When he did, nobody attacked him.
Nobody demanded a speech.
But the room had changed.
Tyler pulled out the chair beside me instead of sitting next to his father.
Dad asked about my years in Kodiak.
Mom wanted to know whether I had photographs from my winging ceremony.
Grandpa told Tyler about the day I nearly put his skiff into a crab trap.