Chapter 13
If Daniel Warren had never called, Thursday would not necessarily have ended anything.
It might have become the first day of something.
THE THURSDAY HE WAS NEVER AT THE OFFICE
PART 4: WHAT TRUST COSTS
Lucas called in sick again on Friday.
This time he did it from the kitchen while I listened.
The absurdity almost made me laugh.
After he hung up, I said, “At least this one is real.”
He looked at me.
Neither of us smiled.
I told him I needed him to leave.
He didn’t argue at first.
“For how long?”
“I don’t know.”
“Where am I supposed to go?”
The question irritated me.
I stared at him until he understood.
“Right. Sorry.”
He could solve that problem himself.
He packed enough clothes for a week.
I watched from the bedroom doorway.
The same blue suit he had worn Thursday was hanging over a chair.
I couldn’t look at it without seeing the entire fake workday again.
Lucas stopped beside the dresser.
“I ended contact with Rachel.”
I said nothing.
“I sent her a message this morning.”
I still said nothing.
“She agreed.”
“Okay.”
He turned toward me.
“That’s all?”
“What do you want me to say?”
“I don’t know.”
“Thank you?”
“No.”
“Congratulations?”
His face tightened.
“I deserve that.”
“This isn’t about what you deserve.”
I was tired suddenly.
Exhausted in a way sleep couldn’t repair.
“It’s about the fact that you keep offering me things that should never have been taken away.”
He stared at me.
“Ending contact with her isn’t a gift to me.”
“I know.”
“Then stop presenting it like one.”
He nodded.
He zipped the suitcase.
At the bedroom door, Lucas stopped.
“I love you.”
There had been a time when those words solved things.
Arguments.
Bad days.
Misunderstandings.
We would say them like a bridge.
That morning they sounded like another contradiction.
“I believe you think you do.”
Lucas looked wounded.
I didn’t apologize.
He left ten minutes later.
The house changed after he was gone.
Not physically.
His coffee mug was still in the dishwasher.
His razor was still in the bathroom.
His running shoes were still by the closet.
But the silence became different.
For the first time since Daniel called, I could think without Lucas’s shame taking up space in the room.
I walked through the house slowly.
Twelve years.
That was how long we had been married.