Chapter 14
“Why turn off your phone?”
“Because I knew what would happen after he received the photograph.”
“What?”
“He would come looking for me.”
“You disappeared because you were afraid of Adrian?”
A sad smile touched her mouth.
“No.”
She looked toward the front of the chapel.
“I disappeared because I was afraid of myself.”
I frowned.
“That doesn’t answer anything.”
“I know.”
She sat again.
After several seconds, I sat at the opposite end of the pew.
Vanessa looked older when I was close enough to see the shadows beneath her eyes.
“I saw you in Cambridge six weeks ago.”
My stomach tightened.
“You followed me for six weeks?”
“No.”
She shook her head.
“I followed you for three days.”
“That is not particularly comforting.”
“I know.”
She folded her hands together.
“I had gone to Boston for another cardiac evaluation.”
“How bad is it?”
She smiled without humor.
“Bad enough that doctors have stopped using encouraging adjectives.”
I looked away.
Whatever I felt about her, I could not enjoy hearing that.
“I came out of a café near the hospital and saw you walking past.”
Her voice softened.
“At first, I thought I had imagined you.”
“I crossed the street.”
“You followed me.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because I had spent six years wondering what happened to you.”
I looked at her sharply.
“Why would you care?”
Vanessa’s eyes met mine.
“Because I watched a man destroy the best thing in his life and spent six years wondering if I had helped him do it.”
Anger flared inside me.
“You were the reason he left.”
“No.”
The answer was quiet but firm.
“He was the reason he left.”
I said nothing.
Vanessa continued.
“I called him that night because I was terrified.”
“I know.”
“I thought I was dying.”
“I know that too.”
“He came.”
My fingers curled against my coat.
“I noticed.”
Pain moved through her expression.
“When he told me you had fallen outside, I told him to go home.”
I stared at her.
“He told you?”
“Hours later.”
“Then you knew he had left me there.”
“Yes.”
“And you still let him stay?”
Her face tightened.
“That is the part I have never forgiven myself for.”
Silence filled the chapel.
“I told him to leave three times.”
She looked down.
“The fourth time, I stopped.”
“Why?”
“Because I was afraid.”
Her voice cracked.
“I had loved him once too.”