Chapter 12
“You didn’t have to take care of everything,” I said.
“I was still here.”
“I know.”
“No, Benjamin.
You didn’t know.
You assumed I could manage alone because I always had.”
He swallowed.
“I was scared.”
“So was I.”
He looked up.
“I was scared of losing Dad.
I was scared of losing the house.
I was scared of being a failure.”
“And instead of telling me, you let me pay for the fear.”
His eyes filled.
For the first time since he arrived, I believed he was not simply performing regret.
“I thought if I could get the business running properly, everything would be fine.”
“What happened to the business?”
He hesitated.
I waited.
“It’s struggling.”
“How badly?”
He looked at the floor.
“Badly enough that I used some of the money intended for household expenses to cover payroll.”
I closed my eyes briefly.
“How much?”
“About forty thousand dollars.”
“Your money?”
He shook his head.
“Money from a credit line.
And some money Genevieve had set aside.”
“Did you tell her?”
“Not at first.”
I let the silence stretch.
“And the account Richard mentioned?”
Benjamin’s face tightened.
“That’s complicated.”
“Then explain it simply.”
He sighed.
“Last year, I opened a business account to manage a new consulting project.
The project didn’t work out.
I borrowed money to cover the losses.”
“Did you use my payments to support that account?”
“Some of them.”
I felt the old instinct rise in me: the urge to reassure him, to tell him that everyone made mistakes, to ask how much he needed.
I let the instinct pass.
“What is your plan?”
He looked surprised.
“My plan?”
“Yes.
Your plan to solve the problem without relying on me.”
He stared at me for several seconds.
“I haven’t figured that out yet.”
“Then you have something important to do.”
He rubbed his eyes.
“Are you really going to let us lose the house?”
“I am not making that decision for you.”
“You could save it with one phone call.”
“Yes.”
“Then why won’t you?”
“Because I already saved it once.
And again.
And again.
And every time I did, you learned that the consequences of your decisions would eventually become mine.”
He stood and walked to the window.
For a while, neither of us spoke.
Finally, he said, “I didn’t know you felt that way.”
“I told you, several times.”
“You said you were worried.”