Chapter 17
The new dress.
Daniel's last-minute meeting.
I had eaten leftover pasta while he worked late.
I never told the children why I'd been upset.
Apparently, I hadn't needed to.
“Mom,” Sophie said, “you don't have to keep proving you tried.”
I covered my mouth.
For a long time, neither of us spoke.
Then I asked about her job, and she told me about a difficult client who had apparently forgotten how email worked.
We laughed.
And when we hung up, I cried.
Not because Sophie had said anything cruel.
Because she had given me permission I hadn't realized I was still waiting for.
Adam's reaction was quieter.
He came over that Sunday to help me carry old boxes down from the attic.
We worked for an hour before he finally said, “Dad told me you're filing.”
“Yes.”
He nodded.
Then he lifted another box.
“Okay.”
I watched him.
“Are you upset?”
He set the box down.
“I'm upset that this happened.”
“So am I.”
He rubbed the back of his neck.
“I love Dad. But I don't think he understands how badly he handled any of this.”
I gave a small smile.
“That's a generous description.”
Adam looked at me.
“Mom, I need you to know something.”
“What?”
“I don't expect you to forgive him just because he's my father.”
My throat tightened.
“I know you love us both.”
“I do. But loving both of you doesn't mean I have to pretend you were treated fairly.”
I hugged him.
He held on for a long time.
Then he cleared his throat and said, “Also, Sophie told me about Michael Lawson.”
I stepped back.
“Oh, no.”
Adam grinned.
“Apparently Dad thought Mom was having a secret romance.”
“Adam.”
“Is he the lake guy?”
I laughed.
“Yes.”
“The one who convinced you to jump off the dock?”
“He did not convince me.”
Adam raised an eyebrow.
“That's not how Aunt Diane tells it.”
I shook my head.
“Apparently my childhood has become family entertainment.”
He smiled.
And for the first time in months, I felt that my relationship with my children might survive this change without requiring me to sacrifice myself to protect them.
Daniel did not accept the divorce immediately.
For several weeks, he called more often than he had during the last year of our marriage.
He sent flowers.
He forwarded photographs from vacations we'd taken.
He wrote long messages about memories, regrets, and all the things we could still do together.